STF Student Rogelio Carbajal: Do You Want To Be a BEAST?

This summer, Serve The Future (STF) focused on the theme Awareness/Communication – ON & OFF the court, emphasizing Self-Awareness and Court Awareness. Reflect on how the activities, coaching, and experiences provided by STF challenged you to grow and helped you become more aware—both as a tennis player and as a person. How did this awareness impact your performance on the court and influence your choices, mindset, or relationships off the court? Use specific examples to show how STF made a difference in your personal development.

Do you want to be a BEAST? I do. At Serve The Future practices, becoming a beast seems to be the ultimate goal. But what does it actually mean to be a “beast”, what does a beast do? These are questions I found myself asking when reflecting on our Beast Sheet mental exercises during practice.

I remember when Kurt first invited me to a STP practice, I was a bit sceptical and unsure of what to expect. I had already been playing tennis for a few years at that point, but never had I seen or experienced an organization similar to STP where players could come together and reinforce both physical and more importantly mental aspects of the game; That's where the Beast Sheet comes in.

After that first practice at the country club, when Kurt asked me to fill out my “Beast Sheet” I remember laughing at him thinking he was joking (I’m not sure why the name just felt a bit silly to me). However when he handed me a physical copy of one of these charts, I quickly realized that he was serious.

What the heck is a Beast Sheet? “Beast” is an acronym which stands for body language, effort, attitude, self talk, and team spirit. Every practice we would fill out these sheets and give ourselves a rating of one through five for these five metrics as a way to measure how we personally felt we did each day. This is where I experienced the most growth in my self awareness through Serve The Future. Filling out the beast sheet and reflecting eventually had me reflecting on more than just tennis, but also in other departments of my life such as school, relationship and specifically in my mindset.

Entering university, I had a big goal in mind, and that was to remain grounded and enjoy every moment of life, taking every opportunity for all it had to offer and learning as much as I could for it. And to say I accomplished this goal would unfortunately be a lie, I definitely did get out during my first year at Boston University, but not to the extent that the eager fresh high school graduate Rogelio would have hoped for. This lack of involvement came from a fear of failing. Whether this be taking an instructional machining course at the engineering machine shop, or joining engineering clubs, or exempting myself from social events. The fear of failing kept me from taking full advantage of all the opportunities that college had to offer me. Reminiscing of this, I can conclude that this behavior and attitude was not beast like, I let fear and anxiety get the best of me.

The preceding paragraph may seem like a tangential rant that is obsolete and irrelevant to this conversational essay. However this realization of my fear of failure was made through the Beast Sheet, reflecting on my tennis play has made me realize that I have been pulling my punches and inevitably holding myself back from everything life has to offer, simply because I was afraid of failing. I would like to quote my favorite move growing up Kung Fu Panda “Before the battle of the fist, comes the battle of the mind.” (Master Shifu). This quote perfectly takes the real world value of the beast sheet, past its on court applications. EVERYTHING, and I mean EVERYTHING in life is a mental game. Playing tennis, you are in a mental battle between yourself and your opponent. Starting your career or going to university, you are mentally battling yourself and testing your mental fortitude and perseverance. Even starting a family your patience and communication will be relevant. This is the real value behind the beast sheet, it was not just a simple reflection of physical capabilities on a tennis court, but a measure of strength of mind and tenacity. Thanks to STP and the Beast Sheet, I now understand better how the greatest struggles in life are all mental, and how confronting all adversity with a winning mindset is a game changer in life.

I will most certainly be applying what I have taken from the Beast Sheet in my everyday life. Quoting Dead Poets Society “Carpe Diem” (DPS)- Seize the Day. From my experiences with the beast sheet, I will hopefully be able to overcome my fear of failing and take advantage of all opportunities allotted to me. Working towards improving my network, engineering capabilities and social skills through similar reflection tactics and strategies applied in the beast sheet. I know that avoiding failure is impossible, however by accepting it, reflecting on it, and learning from it, real improvement is possible.

Rogelio Carbajal
Graduated from Tempe HS
Boston University, Sophomore 
1 year in STF